Is Steve Tew F****ng Mad ?!?!?!?

Voluntary leaving of the First Division to move to the second.

Now lets just think about that for the moment. The head of New Zealand Rugby, Steve Tew has stated that four teams have to go from the Air New Zealand Cup to make it a ten team competition from 2010. We're fine with that but what the brains trust haven't made clear is how this process is being carried out or attempted. Well on Sunday Steve "Alcatraz" Tew revealed that information - it will be voluntary and he's hoping the unions who want to be demoted will nominate themselves.

Pardon us?

Tuesday week there was a NZRU meeting in Wellington. At that meeting all the unions were asked to consider jumping ship and joining the reformed second division. The SST states that 'Unions such as Tasman and Counties have been vigouroulsy lobbying to keep the competition in its present state'. However the NZRU has yet to come up with a plan B, that is that there is currently no viable alternative involving a second division.

We just can't believe this! Why on earth would a team nominate itself for relegation from the premiere New Zealand domestic competition! Voluntarily?!?!??! Where dear god is the sense in this? Even though we have Unions that are Bankrupt (Hello Counties Manukau) even they won't voluntarily go down. No exposure on television apart from that awful Heartland Rugby Program, limited corperate and sponsorship opportunities, smaller crowds, less money? Does any of these seem viable and something that a team would voluntarilty want?

What's scarely as plausiable is the fact that there is no plan 'B'. We have stated this before and at length, Steve Tew needs to make a decisive decision here and cull the chaff.

Here's your plan Steve, the one that you need to keep your job and we wont even charge you for using it: Goodbye Northland, Goodbye Tasman, Goodbye Counites Manukau, and goodbye to Auckland. Make a decision Steve and be decisive. Also bring back the Magnum PI.

An Open Letter to Steve Tew

Dear Steve 'The Mongoose' Tew.
New Zealand Rugby Union HQ & Brains Trust.

Currently the format of the Air New Zealand Cup, the premier New Zealand rugby competition in New Zealand is under review. You in your wisdom as the most powerful administrator in New Zealand have put the format up for revision.

We would like to suggest that you reshape the competition by the removing the following teams:
* Northland - Whangarei is a horrible, dangerous place. Its not safe and there's not a fan base to support a decent team. Fans in the area are not passionate. People don't care. The team is more famous for its two year losing streak when its only win was the promotion relegation farce against the best team from the Heartland Championship.
* Counties - Manukau - they are bankrupt as you as the businessman that you are know that you've had to underwrite them last year and this year as well. They have a mascot that's named after a Dildo from a Clockwork Orange. What example does that set for kids, Stevie. They have a massive player base but no-body wants to watch them play and last year they were the worst team in the competition - and they still beat Auckland.
* Tasman. Nelson is not a very nice place and its certainly not a first division standard ground. I dont think that you should eat the pies there Steve. Struggling for identity they would make a great Hearland Championship Rugby Team.
* Auckland - Supporters not up to it, a apathetic place which is dangerous. Eden Park is barely functional as a location - the local crowds are invariably out numbered by Away supporters. A miserable place. Steve in Auckland people randomly spit on you on the street, Steve in Auckland there's home less people and street crime, armed robbery, parking is expensive. Steve people don't care, they're apathetic and need to go. Its for the good of the game Steve.

Steve as our greatest administrator were asking you to take a stand for the good of the game.

Nobody likes a hero Steve but you can be a hero to the Rugby public of New Zealand. Children would look up to you for generations to come. Auckland sits like a bloated leech on New Zealand draining us of resources and spreading its poison far and wide. Take a stand now Steve.
Make Auckland one of the four.