Sunday, June 14, 2009

Daniel Carter is a Supreme Mincer


Well it seems official - if the Herald on Sunday is to believed, and lets face it since its journalism in New Zealand they must be 100% accurate, Dan Carter is signed, sealed and shortly will be delivered to the Blues. The Sunday Papers were all over it here, and while in possibly the most non-committal press conference ever Dan Carter earlier the week didn't admit it he also didn't deny it either. I want to make this quite clear - anyone from Canterbury or Christchurch isn't up to much and is likely to be a blood relative of their immediate family and has a high probability of also being linked by marriage. Six fingers are common for the area.

But just as we wouldn't be rushing to buy Steve Walsh a drink at the bar, or we'd watch out for the door frame if we were Adam Thompsons Missues Dan Carter's a massive mincer if he's signing for the Blues. No one in New Zealand is worth $400,000 let alone some judas deserting his province. Lets have a look at some other who've done the same: Nick Evans lasted just over 12 months and never set anything on fire. Auckland maybe also looking to poach Jimmy Cowan as well, although Taxi Drivers at Co-Op Taxis can breathe a sigh of relief as that may be just wishful thinking. Lets look at some quotes from the press conference:

"Christchurch is still my home and it is the place closet to my heart" (I'll move if the money's right, please don't be angry Canterbury fan's despite the fact I dumped you for the Franc)

"I am living here in Auckland but Canterbury has given me so much when it comes to Rugby"
(As above- but you moron but why take a sabbatical to stab them in the back?)

"It wouldn't be easy" he said asked if it would be hard to leave Canterbury "I'm where I am now because of the opportunities that they've given me" (No shit).

"I'm off contract for Canterbury but have not thought about it much while in France. I haven't talked to my management team about it yet". (You have to talk to your management team before you sign a contract? Where do you want to play you fool?)

"Although Auckland is a soul destroying place I would move and play for them (the Blues) if the money was right."

"Eden Park would likely be empty for most games, this is true, but I'd be getting 400k so I wouldn't really give a shit to be honest."

"Blues supporters don't know much about rugby and are not passionate but that's okay, the moneys good bro"

Well you get our point. Dismal. Todd Blackadder Crusaders Coach was supposedly to mount a mercy dash to 'save' Carter - but didn't go. And good on him. In the old days if you deserted your team they used to shoot you, professional rugby may not be as strict but sure as hell if Carter ends up on the bottom of a Mooloo Ruck come 24th October at Waikato Stadium justice will be done.

The fact is that without an effective back line, without a decent coach (hello Pat Lamb watch out for those Reds, they're REAL dangerous away from home) and the likelihood of injury (yes that's right Dan Carter managed five games for Perpignan) the money is surely a huge gamble, one that the desperate Blues shouldn't do.

Our Waikato Uber Alles Supreme Mincer of 2009 Award, before a game is played, before the season even begins goes to Dan Carter.

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